The Obese Can't Eat Normal Food Without a Sense of Panic Or Guilt

At 256 lbs, I saw my naturopath for the firstfewer, larger meals to feel sated, others need to
time. We had a long discussion about food, mygraze through the day. Understanding who you
weight, my depression, and how I wanted toare as an eater becomes paramount in defining a
tackle all of it. The following year after I had lostdiet that will bring weight loss and then let you
136 pounds and visited her again for final bloodadjust it for life-time maintenance.
work, she told me that on the first day we metAccepting that there is no one cookie-cutter diet
she made a note in my file. It said: "Patient viewsout there that will work for everyone, is vital in
food as poison."developing an eating plan. Throwing out all
She had hit it right on. I did. And I am not alone. Ipreconceived ideas of what a diet is, is the only
may have been on the extreme end of theway to move out of the diet/binge cycle.
thought process, but the fear of food was real. InThat fear of eating that has been hammered into
my entire life, I had never eaten one ounce ofus all these years has to be tackled. The only
food without guilt. Even as a child, if I wanted away to do that is to eat. Sounds simple enough,
second apple I felt as though I was proving to allbut in my experience I have found it is harder to
that saw what a pig I really was.get people to eat then it is to get them to diet.
That is why a simple low fat raw food dietWhy? Because all we know is deprivation or guilt.
worked for me. It was minimal and I could enjoyWhen I start a new client on this program, their
as much as I wanted without a drop of guilt. Ifirst week proves how true the above statement
thought I could bring that to the obeseis. They eat tentatively. The foods tend to come
community as a miraculous cure for obesity. Ifrom their dieting history, the amounts minimal.
was wrong.I pick out these dieting foods and ask why they
For each person I helped achieve great weightchose to eat them. Their answer is surprising. Not
loss, there were another twenty who came andonly was the food not satisfying, but oftentimes
went. People would sign up, do the all raw diet forthey ate food they didn't like because that is
their first month or two and have huge weightwhat their dieting brain told them was the only
loss, but then the reality of being on a restrictiveacceptable choice. Now, there are diets out there
diet would hit and they would flee forgetting allon the market that promote lots of eating
about their achievements. Their major complaint:choices. They work for some, but the problem is
"I just want to eat like a normal person."they are small amounts for the calories, and most
What did they flee to? Not another healthy soundobese men and women need bigger servings, and
diet. They returned to the diet/binge cycle - thewhen they eat higher fat, sugar, or salted foods,
only method they knew for day to day eating.cravings dictate that one serving is never enough.
For those of us who have grown up with obesityThat creates more fear of food, and that fear
or entered the dieting world early, we have nolimits viable choices in their idea of what they can
idea what "normal" eating is. All we know is howand cannot eat for weight loss.
to diet or not diet, and the not diet has nothing toI make it clear, I do not want to see those diet
do with eating right. We have proven to ourselvesfoods in their menu again. Panic ensues.
over and over again, that we have no controlIt is a process, a hand holding to calm their
over the food we eat except when on anerves and gain their trust that it is okay to eat
structured diet, and then it is only until we can'tfood as long as they understand that each choice
do it anymore.they make needs to be seen as a whole, and it
I have developed a complete new system forneeds to work with them as a person. Once they
my clients who cannot do the all raw program. Itsee that they really can eat 1800 calories a day
is ten times scarier for them than asking them towithout gaining weight they are amazed. Amazed
live on raw fruits and vegetables. Why? Because Ithat they are now eating foods they saw as
make them eat.detrimental to their dieting cause, and eating those
One of the first things that becomes very clearfoods in amounts they find satisfying.
and they actually all voice is, "I don't know how toNo, not every food they love can be eaten, but
eat like a regular person." When I tell them I wantby examining what foods keep them stated, and
them to eat 1800 calories their first two weekswhat foods cause them to want more, their
to find out what their true maintenance diet willmenu of choices grows and the idea that this
look like, their eyes pop, their voices quake, andtype of diet can be done not just for short term
they stammer: "1800 calories, I can't do that I willloss, but for life becomes empowering.
gain weight." It takes me a while to convinceIt is this fear of food, this fear of not being able
them otherwise.to stick to a diet, this fear that food controls us
The first week is always full of panic. Their menusand not the other way around that keeps the
are peppered with all sorts of ideas on eatingobese obese.
they have picked up from dieting their whole lives.Food is nutrition. Our bodies need it, even our
A lot of it is food they don't even like and wouldbrain needs it to stay balanced and keep us in a
never eat outside a diet. When I tell them to eatgood place. What the obese have to come to
more, to try something new they balk. "No, no, Iterms with is that they are a unique individual, and
can't do it. I will lose control." In truth, that isalthough their obesity issues are common within
exactly what I want them to do.the obese community, their needs to feel satisfied
It is only after examining what out of control is,are quite different.
that we can work together to bring things backFood is neither enemy nor lover. It needs to
to the middle and find a satisfying solution that willbecome a partner in the obese person's quest for
allow them to take control of their eating.health and well-being.
We are all different. Each of us has different likesIf you want to beat your obesity, then you must
and dislikes, our bodies respond to different typesbe willing to work through your fear of eating
of food. Some people can tolerate higher fat,outside of a diet. You must be able to look at
some people can't. Some people can have salt infood realistically and take time to explore what is
their diet without it affecting them, others likeright for you before embarking on your next diet.
me, have to be cautious. Some people need